What would my ideal Mother’s Day be? Similar to my ideal birthday as Mother’s Day falls the closest weekend to by birthday, always.
Let’s start with, I love my extended family but I would love to have a quiet Mother’s Day with my close little foursome. I’d call them and have a pleasant conversation, but just having that down time and no pressure to feel like everything has to be perfect. If they were there, I’d manage.
I’d want the day to be quiet and peaceful. The sun would be shining with a nice gentle light breeze and around the low to mid 70’s for temperature. My family would work together to pack a nice picnic lunch that everyone would enjoy and eat. We’d head to a quiet secluded spot in nature and enjoy the beauty of nature around us. It would be full of laughter and joy.
After we have eaten our lunch, we could go and take a nice walk in the woods. I’d hope for an opportunity to take plenty of photos. Both of our surroundings and of our kids and family, all without groans, complaints and the infamous “are we done yet?” questions. I’d want to have an opportunity to get out from behind the camera and chase my kids around.
I’d hope for a day where Em and I could get through without meltdowns and sensory overloads. Where the time away from the noise and hustle and bustle of everyday life could just melt away and bring rejuvenation. As the day would wind down, we’d watch a lovely sunset and find our way home.
Once home, I’d love to spend time with my kids and husband all curled up together on our couch. All snuggled up in the dark watching a movie that we can all get into and have a gentle thunder storm in the background.
I love the simplicity of it. I wouldn’t want gifts but rather letters or notes from my kids that I can treasure and keep close to my heart. Ideal for me is the calm and leisure of it all.
My family lets me know I’m loved every day. From my teenage son to my soon to be teen and my husband all finding ways that are subtle and yet say “I love you”. The best way I know I’m loved is by the conversations I have with my family. Each one has time throughout the day to share and tell me about their day.
Most parents dream of the communication I have with my kids. Christian will spend time talking to me telling me about his day, his friends, what he plans for the weekend or asking about our weekends to try and plan something. He takes Em in the morning and often makes sure she gets to school on time. He may complain on occasion about his sister knowing all his friends and her “tagging along” but I notice how his friends and him embrace her and tolerate her with a smile, most of the time.
Em will come and crawl into bed by me late at night or early in the morning sometimes and put her arms around me wanting to snuggle and/or talk. She tells me her aspirations, her dreams, and her fears. We talk about how she’s managing with her coping skills and she is open to ideas on how to better handle situations. She will sometimes be the little drama filled teen all girls have the potential to be but usually that means she needs a few minutes down time. Once that passes, she is all about moving forward. She also tries to take direction when it comes to my interventions when big teens need some little teen to be to take a time out away or calm it down a bit.
Matt is my rock. The days I am exhausted and worn, he tries to pick me up and keep me from losing my mind. If I need some down time or alone time, I don’t have to ask, I just have to let him know what’s up. If I need to vent, he listens while I rage on against the world. If I meltdown, he sends me to my room to decompress. He sees all the beauty underneath that occasional ugly exterior and loves me all the more for it. He knows my weakened points and flaws and he watches out for me when I can’t do it myself.
And the best part is at any given time, my family is known to plop down next to me and snuggle up watching a movie or TV show. Sometimes it’s all just noise and we giggle, talk and have some fun and depth. On the surface, it’s good. If you look closer it’s the best.
I think if had to pick a song to remind me of being a mom, but also my life in general, I’d pick Martina McBride’s Song “Blessed”. It’s not always an easy path, but I know that I’ve got so much more than I could have ever imagined. While we have challenges and have to face the day, it’s a new day each dawn. My kids’ laughter brings joy to me and I know that I wouldn’t trade in anything as we are blessed to have each other and have found a way to embrace our diversity in our family. It’s the quiet still moments we’ve learn cherish.
I have been blessed
And I feel like I’ve found my way
I thank God for all I’ve been given
At the end of every day
I have been blessed
With so much more than I deserve
To be here with the ones
That love me
To love them so much it hurts
I have been blessed
**Jennifer Marie Dirks and her daughter, Em, share their journey on Em’s Journey, their Facebook page, and on their blog, Emelie’s Voice. Em has Autism and wants people to see the world through her eyes.
**A Mother’s Day is a collaboration between Jodi Murphy and Jessica Wade with contributions by the marvelous Mighty League Moms. Jodi is the founder of Geek Club Books, autism storytellers through mobile apps for the social good. Jessica is a married mother of four ‘genius’ children. She is a full-time working mama and runs a website and blog dedicated to her son, Micah, who is non-verbal with autism and congenital hypothyroidism. She is also Founder of MicahBoyGenius Foundation, a non-profit created to provide iPads to non-verbal children.
**Original photograph by Jennifer Marie Dirks