How Do I Trust Myself with My Future?

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One of the things I’ve struggled with over the years is how to trust people with my future. But what’s even braver is trusting myself with my own future.

Can you relate?

Are you someone who asks for advice frequently even when your instincts have an answer? Unlike for some, it’s easy for me to tell my story because I see my past as something that cannot hurt me anymore than it already has and I don’t need advice about my past. But this moment, a new task, new adventure? I’m finding myself questioning my own decisions instead of trusting my own intuition.

One of the ways that I’ve practiced learning to trust in general, is actually by trusting my body more often. It helps me translate to an emotional trust as well. For whatever reason, it often feels more brave to trust myself than others regardless of what it is: Trusting myself to drive to a brand new place, talk to a brand new person, and trusting myself physically with yoga or, more specifically this month, snowboarding.

The bunny hill was terrifying at first.

I have never skied in my life never mind snowboarding! I even fell and grabbed the railing while riding the conveyor belt on the way back up and had to ride up the belt sideways. I was so wobbly. My mind was out of focus and panicked. My experience with snowboarding this month taught me many things about myself emotionally and physically.

Even on the bunny hill, I struggled to trust my body to move when I asked it to. I frequently would forget to lean in. Instead, I would straighten my legs when anxious and ultimately fall backwards. This wasn’t just my balance. A lot of it was a lack of trust of my own ability to learn something new.

But I will say that as an individual with Autism Spectrum Disorder, balance is a huge obstacle for me in many areas of my life. Snowboarding was no exception. But that afternoon, I learned to embrace the process of learning to trust my body just a little bit more.

Here is what else I learned:

We are going to fall from time to time whether on a snowboard, on a first date, a first day at a new job or even tasks we do every day. Bracing ourselves with fear reduces our chances of success. That day, on that bunny hill, I fell several times. But I learned to laugh about it and learn from my mistakes and not stay focused on them.

It also felt like a huge reminder that balance is important in absolutely every area of our lives. Snowboarding helped me realize that if my mental focus was in a million directions, my physical and emotional balance was out of focus and I would end up failing and falling. Staying present in the moment helped me stay on track.

What ways do you practice trust in your life?

Does trusting yourself to make good choices feel braver than trusting a friend? How do you practice balance when it comes to staying present while not losing sight of the future?

As a side note: I have very some exciting brave news for you next month (and no helmet was required!)

Read about Gretchen

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